More Cowboyisms for the New Year (Unedited)

So the Princess says “Why don’t “You” write something for OUR blog”. Not sure when this addiction became OUR’s but here goes.

First of all what she just doesn’t understand is being equipped with SOOOO much knowledge is a massive burden to carry as it is without the added weight of having to put it to script. But I will humbly try.

Why?

Because the Princess asked that’s why.

Let us begin this journey with an understanding that;

Folks think everything revolves around the sun, but once you’ve kissed a Princess you “know” that everything in the universe revolves around her.

Do any of you understand the 12 months of Christmas? That is probably the first thing I had to learn. Christmas is not a single day, it is EVERY day. There are only two exceptions to this rule and that is Princess Birthday and Princess Anniversary day. The real easy rule to understand is when she says “Oh I don’t want anything for my######day. SHE DOESN’T MEAN IT, SHE DOEN’T MEAN IT, believe me. Did I say “SHE DOESN’T MEAN IT”. I only made “THAT” mistake ONCE.

Treat a woman like a racehorse, and she'll never be a nag.

When you are travelling in an RV you must make travel plans. These travel plans need to be conveyed to all parties involved. But not before 11:00 am and should not include any information other than where you will be taking her for dinner that evening, what type of stores will be near the area you will be stopping at and if we will be leaving at 9:00am or 11:00am. NOTHING happens before these hours. While you are on the road do everything in your power to not make the coach sway or bump as it disrupts the slumber time or makes the I-pod skip.

Cowgirls are like barbed wire…Handle with Care.

You had better have cleaned the front windows to a totally transparent sheet of glass or “You are just going to ruin my pictures”. It is a little hard but possible to set the coach on cruse and climb around onto the front bumper at 60mph to accomplish this task but it does take more dexterity than I have any more.

When you finally arrive at your Rv Park after a grueling 4 hour drive you may hear. “I don’t care what site we have”. . SHE DOESN’T MEAN IT, SHE DOEN’T MEAN IT, believe me. Did I say “SHE DOESN’T MEAN IT”. I only made “THAT” mistake ONCE. If there is a lake she will be beside it. If it has a scenic view she will be viewing it. If she would like shade get your shovel and start moving that huge elm. If the sun is going down in the wrong spot----You get it.

Well this has been different. As I mentioned at the outset I have an extreme amount of knowledge just not sure I used any of it as I have written this but in ending The Princess and I have had the greatest times of our lives since we started this journey 7 years ago. I wouldn’t trade any of the memories we share for a million bucks. To say you love your best friend sounds a little smushy but there you have it and She’s still as purdy as a new red wagon.

I have attempted to add some pearls of wisdom it this passage. You will have to sort through to find them. Since this may be the last any of you hear from me always remember.

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen are defrocked, shouldn’t it follow that cowboys would be deranged.